Once eggnog hit the shelves, Mrs. Claus thought it'd be funny to "juice up" Santa's drink. Now the jolly elf is passed-out after one cup and Mrs. Claus can't keep up with the pre-Christmas demands. She's asked Tammy and Emily to help her out.
We told her, yeah, of course we'd help! But we're Hollywood, baby, so she'd have to speak with our assistant, David Spade. After David picked up our dry cleaning, sorted out the green and red M&M's, and bought our kids' presents, he had a minute to sit down and tell us what Mrs. Claus wanted. We need to give away three Christmas presents, so we're going to interview a group of people, some naughty and some nice, to find those most deserving of Santa's toys. We threw some hot cocoa on David and told him to get on it by cutting his girly hair and going back to his '90s SNL character to start the interview process. These are the "And You Are...?" questions: 1. How many speeding tickets have you gotten? I have NO idea. Probably three or four in my lifetime, but the awesome thing is that I haven't had ANY kind of ticket in at least ten years. Oh, except for a windshield ticket. That's got to be the most annoying thing on earth. 2. Can you pitch a tent? No. Absolutely not even if my life depended on it. But I'm also not very outdoorsy, so I think I'm okay without that talent. 3. What was your worst vacation ever? Well, my most memorable vacation had really horrible moments. I went to China with my best friend when I was 20, and I was sick for eight days out of the three weeks we were there. And I don't mean I had a little sniffley cold. 4. What was the last thing you bought over $100? I have no idea. I am super stingy because I've been a stay at home mom for so long, so there's always just been one income. I can honestly say that the last time I spent over $100 on ONE item was probably wedding related before my wedding last October. 5. We're handing you the keys to what? A new car!! We need one so so badly, but instead of being able to get something tiny to save money on payments and gas, we have to get something to accommodate a Great Dane. So, needless to say, we haven't done that yet. One of these days my movie deal will come, right? 6. What was the last meal you cooked that made even you sick? Haha! Nothing I can think of, but that doesn't mean my food is good. It just doesn't kill anyone. Well, maybe I've been known to murder a few taste buds, but never too much physical harm. 7. Fill in the blank: Oh my gosh! Becky, look at her butt! It is so big. She looks like ____? Ice T's wife, Coco! o.O 8. What was your first car? A yellow VW bug named Benny. I hated that car, but oh wow do I miss it now! 9. Your best friend falls and gets hurt. Do you ask if he/she's okay or laugh first? Oh geez, this is terrible, but I ALWAYS laugh. Its been a problem since I was a kid. People would get so upset, but that just made me laugh harder because I was so uncomfortable and nervous. Its awesome. 10. What's the worst song ever? Anything by Ke$ha, or that terrible Thanksgiving Song that's on YouTube right now. Ugh.